I don’t know what it’s like where you live, but here in the Boston area, the news has been filled with what happened in Paris last Friday – and I’ve been filled with a sense of paradox: both connection and disconnect.
How to connect? How to embrace?
It’s hard to know the difference between ‘the world’ and ‘myself’ and where the separation begins. How do we know who is ‘us’ in the sense of experiencing who something is happening to – when is it happening to someone else and when is it’s happening to ‘us’?
Eiffel Tower – Image by Matt Girling
If we’re a foot away, did it happen to us? If we’re a street away? A city away? A country away? An ocean between us? If we smelled it, or tasted it, or felt it on our skin how different – how very, very different – is that from hearing it on the news? Or is the difference a matter of choice — choosing how connected or disconnected we are?
I don’t know the answers, but as an artist and a human I wonder, and I listen … and I often don’t know how to act, or how to reach out. Yet I feel the impulse – as you would embrace someone who turns to you in tears.
In a world of virtual connection, is there such a thing as the power of a virtual embrace?
If I only imagine my connection to people frightened and in pain in Paris, can I also imagine an embrace that would be felt in their imaginations?
And to the people still invisible to me, whose stories don’t resonate from my kitchen radio? Can I connect, can I embrace? And can that be felt somehow, somewhere? And does it matter? Will the overwhelm of that sense of connection disconnect me?
I’m not asking to get an answer – either from myself or from you, but because asking opens a doorway in my mind and when it’s open, things I haven’t yet imagined come through.
Those at least I know I can embrace as beloved friends … and I can hope that embrace is felt by unknown friends – in Paris, in Syria, in places I don’t know the names of – people fleeing or seeking or alone or in pain – people who need the feel of an embrace, and to know that we are connected.
Hi Deborah,
Here are my thoughts that I just shared with the INTERNATIONAL HARP THERAPY PROGRAM.
The responses that I’m getting are intense. I will include one from a student in London, UK.
Regarding the recent tragedies in France, if one understands the stages of grief, it will be a while before music can be the language to breakthrough the numbness for the people who are deeply grieving. I feel it is not appropriate to run into a situation like this with our harps. In the process of grief, there is the numbness, the anger, the disbelief, then the sadness and then the picking up pieces of life.
So, what can we do as caring individuals of the world when such tragedy happens? We see medics and police responding, doctors repairing, nurses caring, politicians trying to figure out how to deal with the dark side of humanity’s existence – and meanwhile, we sit here and listen to the tragedies over and over and over on the news.
One place I feel that we can be of the most help right now is in the places we are serving and working. Many of you, (and I know that about 70% of the some 400 of you receiving this) are in facilities, nursing homes, schools, cancer centers and many other places of service. How many of you are in facilities where you see the nurses or families glued to the television when a tragedy like this occurs and it plays over and over? Some nurses forget to turn off the television and leave it on for the person ill in bed to be listening to the horror stories over and over. This may seem like such a small thing that we can do, but when we go into the room, we can change that environment. I am not saying turn our back on the situation, but when people are ill, they are in need of something that is going to help them to get better or at least to ease their suffering – not add to it.
There may not be much we can do about the situation in France at the moment but there is much we can do to help those around us with the news they are hearing. Let us make an effort to take our skills and use it to try to bring a bit of peace and solace to those who need it during this time. News always seems to have the ability to bring to the front all the tough things in life, but it is getting heavier and heavier. And when those so deeply affected by the experience are ready to emerge out of their bombshell, send our positive intentions that they will be surrounded by caring people who will help them get through this tragedy.
In order to do this, we need to keep ourselves healthy to be able to help others. We know what that means, good nurtrition, plenty of water, exercise, and prayer/meditation. Who knows how this war of terrorism is going to play out, but there are many more people than they who work for the good of the world, and let us focus on that and join those forces where good prevails. Christina
A response from an IHTP student in London, UK
Harriet Eisendel of London writes:
Last night, sunday I went to play with Elders with special needs at a Home and at 3.30 p.m (afternoon) each person was sitting in the dark! (other than the tv. on with the Terrorists information being relayed) It was unbelievable.
I asked the carers if I could turn the lights on! Hardly anyone speaks English there.
All the Carers were in a State of shock. Too scared to take the train hom let alone go shopping.
We all agreed that it is tragic that the terrorists have never known love. Their fear relayed to them by their parents probably have brought them up learning to hold grenades and shooting with a hand gun.
The shootings they have done in Paris are so awful and the people who have died have lost their lives when everyone needs to struggle and strive to make a beautiful world. The parents of the people who were shot in the cafes rock concert and football areas must be in so many emotional states. My heart cries for them but Harp would help them ….You were so priveleged to be in Japan….Wonderful!
It was a joy to play Harp..yesterday ..(from folk to reggae! to football tunes!!) to every elder in their bedrooms and in the sitting room. We finished playing Christmas songs and I surprised myself by playing Christmas songs I hardly knew on the harp and everyone cheered up! The carers started laughing intead of watching the Memorial service on tv.
Thank you Tina. Please send your URL for your International Harp Therapy program so people can connect to it. And thank you for all your work. – A big hug — DHC
Thanks for your embrace. i am alive in Paris. its been difficult since Friday but we are strong , please make sure you keep safe.
P&L
Deborah – difficult thoughts and feelings to put into words – well said. Thank you,
Martha Gallagher
I feel the pain and horror of that event and have embraced those who are suffering in my mind — in my imagination. There is no distance — because it could happen to us — to me any time, any day, any where. I grieve for humanity — for the unspeakable cruelty and violent acts that human beings are committing in this world that I live in. Why? In tears I keep asking myself- why ?
I appreciate the thoughts you shared, partly because you offered thoughts and questions, not answers. Everyone wants an answer, and sometimes there just isn’t a good one. A least not right now. I believe that if we can feel connected, as you described, then we should be able to send/intend a positive connection in response. Love knows no bounds.